My previous apartment is on the bottom floor of a three story apartment building. We became friends with the three apartments around us but we never meet any of the people on the third floor. All of that information becomes relevant when out of no where a man falls off a balcony on the other side of the pool. My neighbor, who had only made ten steps away, looks back at me just before he jumps the gate of the pool, as if to say " did you see that?" As he rushed over to check on the guy I stood up, (Which I'm sure had to shock the guy because no sooner did he land on the ground than a man in hospital scrubs shows up to make sure he's ok, it's all about the timing ) in complete shock and to see if my mind was messing with me. Nope, it's not the alcohol or my mind, this is happening. I grabbed my iPhone and went to check on the guy and see if I should call 911. I don't know why I didn't automatically call 911 but it might have kept me out of a mess I didn't want any part of.
Shortly after I got to the other side of the pool a short round girl in her 20's appeared from around the corner and said she had called the police already. This girl looked to have been crying because she had big thick black raccoon circles around her eyes and she was wearing a not big enough T-shirt and smaller booty shorts than legal. She intimidated me a little at first. I'm thinking she threw him out, litteraly. Twenty steps behind her was a tall skinny black guy in skinny red pants and an undersized black T-shirt, so this lovers quarrel has a twist. When the dark knight appeared he said this was a "public dispute", what ever that is I'm sure I want no part. This is when I have my first thought of running home and hiding in my bed. Between the shock and fear that something fucked up is either about to happen or just did and the fact that I'm not sure I'm not dreaming. There is such a thing as an extremely bad time to make a brain work in high gear and that's when you've had 3 hours of drunk sleep and half a ciggerette. My mind was toast the moment it processed the sight of that man hitting the ground.
After a few moments I decide to walk back to my balcony so I can digest all the crazy shit I just saw. With the police on the way, a guy that has a lot more first aid than me is there, and the witnesses to fill in the blanks I would only be in the way. Before I could move I heard the wailing of a woman in an odd distorted Spanish and it was at this moment I felt fear. The shock had given way to fear after I saw the woman that was making all the noise. She came running around the corner in an oversized T-shirt and I think she may have only had on panties under her ghetto moomoo. As she comes flying around the corner with her big floppy melons just swinging madly screaming what could only be called mumbles, she raced up to the guy on the ground ( who it's safe to name Angel at this point ) and all I understood her to say was "ay dios mio!!" ( which means OMG in Spanish ) and then some more Spanish mumbling. It was at this point that things took on a circus appeal, when raccoon girl tells the crazy melon lady to shut up in Spanish. Here is when I actually make my retreat back to my balcony where I would be safe. Remember, fear has control of me at this point and there wasn't one good reason I could find to convince me that I could have taken control of the situation.
Now, I am normally a good friend but this time I was selfish, I left my neighbor there with those people all alone. In what seemed like five minutes after the fall and still no ambulance I felt the fight or flight pressure and I found out what kind of man I am. I didn't care because I knew the situation was under control and I was just a spectator in the way. I watched in complete suspense as to what was happening on that side of the pool. At one point Justin the neighbor looked back at me as if to ask me "WTF?" I was over the fear by now and I was overwhelmed with confusion on how I felt about what was going on. I felt a little guilty for leaving my neighbor to deal with the Jerry Springer show and I felt bad for Angel, who knows how bad he was hurt. Maybe he took the Red Bull commercials way to litteral.
Once I made it safely to my balcony that's when the fireworks erupted. The next think I see is melon tits starts to push around raccoon eyes and raccoon eyes responds with a haymaker at the other ladies head. Her shot wasn't well aimed because from what I could tell they had all been drinking all night and none of them should have been awake at that hour anyways but that didn't stop the two women from going at it. They started screaming, cursing, and punching as Angel finally rolled over to his back with my neighbor telling him to stay still until the ambulance gets there. I'm not completely sure the man understood Justin because he only responded to him in broken English and he only answered simple questions he was asked from what my neighbor told me. By now a seriously over matched "Dark Knight" who was out of his weight class was trying to seperate the two women. He had raccoon eyes by the left wrist and he was trying to keep melon tits at bay with his free arm. There are those dreams that most men have about watching women fight and I wish that I could say this was one of those times but sadly enough it wasn't.
As I sat in my chair bewhildered at the current events and watching the women fight out of the corner of my eye I see "Angel" sit up. The movement imediately caught my attention so I watched as he clambered to his feet. As he stood up my neighbor stood next to him and I could see him asking if he was sure he was ok or at least I assume he was asking that, and the man turned and started to walk away past the pillow fight turned brawl. The women saw the man and stopped punching at each other and followed the man and continued to yell though I'm not quite sure at who. After the group of sunday morning fighters had walked away leaving my neighbor Justin standing there with his jaw on the floor in what I can only assume was left over shock and total confusion. My neighbor then walks around the pool towards me with an almost indescribable look on his face and he tells me that he was already running late to his commitment but if he wasn't he would have had to talk to me about what had just occured. Then he grabbed his cup of coffee and keys that he had set on the sidewalk next to the pool gate and he left.So fifteen minutes after it all started I'm sitting on my balcony smoking yet another ciggerette trying to calm down and needing nothing more than sleep. I looked at my phone and saw that it was only 7:20 am and it was back to peace and tranquility but I'm hopped up on some mix of excitement, fear, and confusion and I needed someone to talk to. If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound? That's how I felt, I couldn't ignore it, I thought I witnessed the falling tree and I wanted everyone to know I heard the sound. I knew by seeing Angel drop from the sky that I had no one to tell and if it had not been for my neighbor I'm not sure anyone would have believed me, so I know if the tree falls it will make a noise because we all want to be seen and heard. I posted my story "it's raining Mexicans" on my Facebook page and went to bed knowing my mind was about to explode with questions that have no answer. Why was he on the balcony? How did he not break major bones? Who was he? Who were the people involved? Where were was the ambulance or police for that matter? I guess I'll never know.
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